Ending Violence

Ending Violence is one of my favorite chapters in Feminism is for Everybody. Hooks touches on important points of how to create cultural awareness of domestic violence that is more pervasive then we think. On page 61, she states that patriarchal violence is defined as a more powerful individual who controls others "through various forms of coercive force... male violence against women, same-sex violence, and adult violence against children." I think that it is obvious that this definition is somewhat sexist in itself. And, in general, most people who are sexist in thinking overlook the domestic violence that occurs between people of the same-sex and parents and children. A lot of people tend to only victimize females. But nowadays in society, more children are actually victimized and physically or emotionally abused by male AND female parents. This is even worse, in my eyes, because children are more helpless and tend to have less rights in this society. If they are very young, they sometimes don't have a voice to stand up for themselves or have enough courage and support to do so. They also may still be forming conclusions about the distinctions between "right" and "wrong." There are so many other reasons as well, which contribute to their powerlessness.

I love that Hooks stated that we need to change stereotypes that MEN are always abusers and WOMEN are always nonviolent victims. THIS IS NOT TRUE. Even though statistics may show that male violent acts are more common than female violent acts, we should not underestimate female violence. Women can and should learn to exercise authority without using violence, and men in turn should learn how to treat their women as equals and not try to dominate them or suppress them through violence. Men should also learn how to exercise authority to their children without using violence! But what about women using violence to dominate men? Does that happen often? Maybe it doesn't appear to, but I know women who emotionally abuse men just to get their point across. They belittle their husbands, maybe hit them once and awhile, and try to show them that they are dominant and what they say is right. I am not saying this happens all the time, but it is very likely for women to do this. I feel like the common stereotype is women who emotionally abuse, and men who physically abuse, but the opposite for each sex can be true as well.

Is power and masculinity correlated with violence also? Hooks says it is. So if your wife has a stable job and you are unemployed, you are more likely to exercise domination through abuse. I can see how this is true, but for men who are feminist thinkers, they most likely support their wives and are grateful that they are accomplished human beings who can put food on the table for two, or for a whole family. I think Hooks ends the chapter with a great quote and this is how I will end my blog also: "Feminist efforts to end male violence against women must be expanded into a movement to end all forms of violence. And it is especially vital that parents learn to parent in nonviolent ways" (p. 66).